Trust and Let Go!

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, on your own intelligence rely not.  In all your ways be mindful of Him and He will make straight your paths.”  Proverbs 3:5-6

What a powerful Attitude to have towards our Lord.  Such faith is required of us, to be able to fully TRUST - NOT FEAR what the Lord may be asking of us, or in many cases, telling us.

As a child, we know no different than to TRUST - all that we are told, all that we hear, most everyone we know.  As we grow older, that part within us, that so freely and unconditionally TRUSTS seems to lessen; we become more doubtful, more fearful, more hesitant, more cautious, more controlling.

Why does this seem to also be true of our relationship with God?  Does He give us reasons to doubt?  Or does man?  Does He give us reasons to be afraid? Or does man? Why do we continue to try and control every part of our life, when really we are not the ones in control - GOD IS!

God TRUSTS us - He gave us His only son.  Why do we have such a difficult time TRUSTING Him?

A phrase that was stated repeatedly when I attended a Christ Renews His Parish (CRHP) retreat for the first time in September 2005 was “LET GO; LET GOD.”  Who knew that when it was our team’s turn to select a bible verse for the retreat we would then put on for other women in our parish, we would be led to Proverbs 3:5-6.

In September 2006, as our team was preparing for our Agape service for the CRHP Team 5 Women’s group, I received a phone call from my father.  As I was praying with my CRHP sisters my mother was having what would become the first of four heart attacks in a three week period of time.  As I sat in the surgery waiting room with my father and several of my CRHP brothers and sisters, waiting to speak to a doctor, waiting to hear my mother’s status, I had a feeling of stillness.  It was as if our Lord was holding me up - keeping me from falling apart in front of my father, because he was not coping so well.  I believe that I was surrounded with the armor of prayer from others - with which I was drawing my strength from.

In the early morning hours, I arrived home from the hospital, not really knowing what lied ahead - or what the future had in store for me and my parents.  I wanted to know.  I needed to know.  I needed to feel like I could control the situation, even though logically I knew I couldn’t.  But I wanted to try!

Upon entering my bathroom, I was greeted by our team’s beautiful red candle.    As I stood there holding it, reading the words of our bible verse and looking at the picture on the front of it, I was overwhelmed with emotion. Not only was it a picture of Our Lord, but it was the Divine Mercy picture with the words “Jesus, I Trust In You” underneath it. It was as if these words were screaming out at me louder than ever before. 

TRUST!  TRUST!  I need to TRUST!  I need to HAVE FAITH that I can TRUST IN THE LORD - COMPLETELY!  Not just say it anymore...but do it!  Really do it!  But how was I to do this, when all I could see and feel was the fear of losing my mother while I was 8 months pregnant with my 4th child?  I needed to LET GO; I needed to LET GOD! 

During those three weeks of hospital stays, repeated heart attacks and a quadruple bypass surgery, I never seemed to stray from feelings of peace and calmness.  My only explanation for this is that I finally truly TRUSTED and allowed God to be in control of my life.  Our team verse became so much more than a verse to me - it was my strength.  It was my lifeline to God and it provided me the focus I needed to deal with family, friends, doctors and anyone else that was connected to my mom.  I started every day saying our verse and repeating it again every night before going to sleep.  It had become my mantra.

When faced with adversities, how do we handle them?  Do we run towards God or do we run in the opposite direction?  Are we quiet long enough to hear Him; to listen to what He is trying to tell us?  Or do we continue with the chatter of life around us in an effort to avoid Him because we are afraid of what He might say?  If we truly TRUST in the Lord with all our heart, than we will rely on His intelligence - not ours!  We will want to listen to what He has to say.  If we always remember Him - think of Him - TRUST Him, He WILL make our paths straight!  He Will Show Us The Way!

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, on your own intelligence rely not.  In all your ways be mindful of Him and He will make straight your paths.”  Proverbs 3:5-6